Apocabox – The Manliest Gift Ever


apocaboxYou say you don’t, but you do. It’s your guilty pleasure, your dirty little secret. If any of your friends or family knew, you’d be crestfallen. No, it’s not your re-gifting habit – I’m talking about your fascination with survival and preparedness. You can’t help but daydream about catastrophic circumstances and what you’d do if you had to bug out or rescue your neighbors from disaster. Don’t worry, dad, it’s not only acceptable, it’s en vogue. So this Christmas season, tell your wife and kids what you really want this year – an APOCABOX!

Sparked by TV shows like The Walking Dead, Survivor Man, Doomsday Preppers, and Fat Guys in the Woods, your love and interest in survival situations and post-apocalyptic living have enabled you to see ways to start a fire when others only see a bag of chips from the vending machine. You wish you could convince your family to go camping for a week without taking an RV or staying on a campground. Aren’t your tired of just thinking about cool stuff like that, though? Fight the urge no longer! Sign up for an Apocabox subscription and let the journey begin!

Created by world-renowned survival instructor, author, and television host, Creek Stewart, “APOCABOX is a subscription based survival box.  Every other month, a hand-selected collection of survival tools, information and gear is packed and shipped direct to your doorstep.  The subscription charge is $50 per APOCABOX + $8.95 shipping.  Your APOCABOX is guaranteed to be a good deal – regularly with a retail value of $100 or more.” Inside each box you’ll find a content list that highlights the features and uses of the individual pieces of gear and their respective cost as well as a rundown of the month’s Survival Skills Challenge.

In October’s box, I received the following:apocabox3

  • Fire Keeper – custom molded Kydex sheath for your lighter
  • 550 Fire Cord – can be ignited with just sparks from a ferro rod.
  • Olympia Granola Trail Bar – decent tasting granola bar
  • “Survival is Simple” Patch – put on your favorite jacket or B.O.B.
  • EDC Inconspicuous Handcuff Key – useful to counter illegal detainment
  • Bug Out Band – I could tell you about this, but then I’d have to…
  • Marbles Razor Knife – sharp & compact; perfect for mini-tin survival kit
  • Solar Parabolic Fire Starter – harness the sun’s power to start fire/burn ants
  • Zombie Tinder – Ghoulish, indestructible fire tinder burns hot as Hell
  • Wild Edible Card Deck – Learn what’s safe to eat in your backyard; helps pass time as it doubles as playing cards
  • Creek’s Going Native Bandanna – perfect for cosplay, preventing sunburn, and filtering water

Many dads today are skipping the golf course, bowling alley, and bar to seize the day with their kids. As one such dad, I love that I got to use my Apocabox to help illustrate things they’ve learned about in school and taught them new skills while enjoying a gorgeous fall afternoon outdoors. The look on my son’s face when he say daddy make fire without matches was truly priceless. My daughter’s thought it was awesome that I now had cordage to use as boot laces that had a special string inside to make a fire quickly in case we were ever stranded on the side of the road – something all too common in The Mitten.

We all know kids are a little more easily impressed than we adults. So what did I think of all the stuff inside? Glad you asked. I was blown away at the sight of some of the killer gear packed inside. My personal favorite is the Bug Out Band, which just barely edges out the parabolic lense for the top spot. Not only did I get those major things, Creek packed in a handful of “smalls” for my EDC and get home bag. Truly, though, the highlight of the Apocabox is the Survival Skills Challenge.apocabox2

Previous months may have been a little more cut and dry, but this go around required a special video link to help teach the necessary skills to pass the challenge. All subscribers focused the sun’s rays at a piece of punky wood and in a matter of seconds (SECONDS!) had a smoldering ember that was ready to be placed into a well constructed tinder bundle. In less than three minutes from start to finish, I had successfully created a life sustaining fire from nothing more than a “mirror” and some dry wood.  To the right you’ll see my tinder bundle engulfed in flames. What an incredible feeling!

No longer did I have to imagine if I’d be able to create a fire without matches. I knew that I could (with full sun, of course). The 550 Fire Cord produced the same exhilarating results after it ignited from sparks that flew off the ferro rod. It didn’t go as quickly as the previous method, but it worked in less than ten minutes. That’s a winner in my book.

Share your love of the outdoors and having a survivalist mindset with your children. It’ll be good for both of you to unplug, whether it be for a few hours or a few days. You can get prepared for that camping trip in the Sierra’s you’ve always dreamed of by first honing your skills and obtaining the proper gear for your bag. Sign up for your APOCABOX here or leave the page open for your spouse to see. She’s a smart lady (she did marry you after all), she’ll get the hint. It’s well worth your money, unlike that Diaper Genie you splurged on. You’ll enjoy learning a new skill and avoid being busted for re-gifting  another reindeer sweater.