The Case for a Home Theater



There’s no doubt a man’s home is his castle. As such, it’s his responsibility to ensure the general well-being of his loyal subjects, protect the kingdom from threats, and make sure his Queen is satisfied. His days are filled with meetings, due dates and deadlines. Complicating matters, however, is the arrival of an heir to the throne. Ask any King and they’ll tell you that making time for a date night with his queen is sometimes harder than it is to laugh at the jester’s joke the third time around.

What is his royal majesty to do then? Heaven forbid he treats his better half like a common peasant. Here’s an idea: make date night one she won’t soon forget all while staying in the confines of your house, err…. castle. Enter the home theater.

Consider this, in order to successfully execute a “Dinner and a movie” date, you must first line up a trustworthy babysitter. Good ones cost more money – and they’re worth every penny. Not as easy as it sounds, trust me. Next, you need to make dinner reservations and then you need to use you phone to snag two tickets to whichever ‘chick-flick’ is on that night.

While you’re out, she’ll want to call to check in on the kids every thirty to forty-five minutes, the food will be okay, but the loud bozo three rows back is enough to make you almost wish you could go through a dry run of ‘Fight Club’ in the basement.

All of this could have been avoided with a nice home theater in the family room. Date night could have been six steps from the bedroom. No lines, overpriced snacks, sticky seats, and no loud talkers. Bonus: not having to deal with the meatheads who just watched Fast and Furious 10 as they peel out in their tricked out rides.

Her royal highness wanted to eat too, right? Grab a few of these kitchen gadgets and whip her up something special for her or order “to go” from your favorite local hotspot. What your dining room lacks in ambiance is more than made up for with the customer service the two of you receive both during and after dinner, when she generously tips the waiter.

As parents, we’re generally broke all of the time, which means you’ll need to remind your wife that the mini-fortune spent won’t be used only two or three times a month. The TV will be a good sitter in its own right when you need to fold laundry or go pee. SpongeBob looks great when he’s 50″ tall. And did I mention that she’d love seeing Brad Pitt or George Clooney in full 1080P high definition? So what do you say, guys? Is it time to make a stop at Best Buy or what?


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